What Shall we do with the Drunken Sailor!
Steve George (I am not sure if that is his real name) was an ex-Bootneck, well that's what he told everybody. He was an enigma that is for sure!!!
I think he did some training with them once but was sea sick. I recall he seemed to spend most of his time as a Storeman in A Squadron running the armoury in similar fashion to Stirling Lines in Hereford. This was a bit of a sod as he had to continually walk around with a bit of black tape across his eyes (Steve is pictured left ready to take in A Squadron GPMGs) and as he was blinded he kept banging into things and was therefore off sick for some considerable period of time!
He would often crop up when you least expected it, and when he was the Squadron NOS it was a time to make the effort in going to the Squadron Bar as he would often tell stories from when he was on 'Special' missions behind enemy lines. He would recall how he had taught Andy McNab and Chris Ryan all they knew, and how they were both lucky to pass selection. Infact he once said that Andy McNab was an illiterate Jacket Twat!I really think this is when he used to go to Cornwall from his native Devon!!
Andy Fisher and myself, thought it would be very funny one night to fill in all of the little gaps in the A Squadron NOS book that were left between entries with bogus reports all from Cpl Steve George! Giggling like school kids we put in entries with DTG such as:
.........at the date and time stated I undertook the mission of A Squadron NOS. Ensured that all surveillance devices that were monitoring the Squadron lines were working correctly. It was noted the anti-personnel mines that were laid to prevent people walking on the grass were exposed. I re-dug them in under cover of darkness!
.......Attempted to close the Squadron bar without success. I re-grouped and then phoned Gutersloh Air Ops. There was an Jaguar Squadron placed on 5 minutes standby. I then set up listening devices to the external walls of the bar just to confirm who the ring leaders actually were. It also seemed that at least 3 nigs were being held hostage. Decided that a softly softly approach was required so marked the bar with LTM and called in an air strike. One 500lb bomb was dropped and the bar was closed, albeit 10 minutes late without any friendly casualties. 3 x Bravos were killed!
........3 new guys were met at the Guard Room. Upon RV'ing with them, we cammed up and proceeded to the Squadron Lines undetected. I gave each of them a 'baccy tin' with crushed OXO cube, fishing line, an emergency Topic bar, matches, hooks, water purification tablets, a rice paper map of Europe and compass. I then took them to an OP position between A and B Squadron blocks using my knowledge of where the anti personnel mines were to prevent any accidents. I explained where the emergency RV was and gave them their orders. They were told to remain in this covert position all weekend and to report to the SSM first thing on Monday morning!
As time went on the NOS book was filled with lots of this nonsense, Andy McNab would have learnt a thing or two about the SAS that is for sure. Gaps were left on purpose so that we could insert another chapter of this remarkable man's military career. The sight of his stripped down landrover, brimming with Machine Guns, water, and ammunition racing over to A Squadron tank park to check the security was truly inspiring to youngsters such as me. Many a Saturday afternoon was spent listening to Steve as he explained how to map read around Barker Barracks using home made maps on rice paper so if captured by someone from 3 RHA it could be eaten. His exploits from when he was in the Jungle were also exciting, we listened open jawed to tales of going without food for weeks on end and living of the land, it was real Boy's Own stuff. I must admit, I was unaware of any Jungles in Devon, but it never less was a fantastic story, those Japs just never stood a chance!
Because of his nautical background, the Hornpipe became very popular within the Squadron. The mere mention of his name was guaranteed to make anybody within ear shot to start this dance. I recall once at 0445 at Hohne, just prior to going out to the ranges, the Squadron were waiting for the buses on the parade square. Somebody shouted from the Squadron block " AS ANYBODY SEEN STEVE GEORGE?". It was pandemonium, the whole Squadron were dancing around singing What Shall we do with the Drunken Sailor? with gay abandon!!
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Pictured above on an FTX in the early 1980s are Steve George RN and me - Another famous picture that appeared somewhere. What was funny was that the publisher blacked out the wrong face.....mine!!! |
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Another famed occasion with photographic evidence occurred when the Regiment conducted Improved Fire Control System (IFCS) commissioning on their Chieftain tanks at Bergen Hohne ranges. A 'round robin' system was used which included each Squadron 'ammo bashing' for another. A Squadron were doing their stint with the ammo for B Squadron and it was horrendous weather I recall. Of course Steve George, recently returned to the Regiment from 'Special Op's' (Most people think it was behind enemy lines in the Falklands, it transpired he was on his Storeman Class 1 course) was in his element telling everybody how it reminded him of his time on North Atlantic convoy duties!
Chris 'Shuggy' Jefferies was in charge of the ammunition point and was slightly taken aback by the way that we approached it. B Squadron tanks were arriving at the ammo point, their crews looking mightily fed up with the weather. People like Ginge Austin, Phil Friend and Bob Jacobs were jumping on their tanks telling them to "Fcuk off out the way.....we will bomb it up!". The tank crews did not need to be asked twice and would go and grab a brew whilst we put the ammo on board and it seemed to be working well....and then somebody shouted "HAS ANYBODY SEEN STEVE GEORGE?". The picture below shows the A Squadron immediate response whilst 'Shuggy' looks on in total amazement!.
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It is difficult to make out who is who in the above Hornpipe picture, but that's me in the front in the centre, with 'Plug' Austin behind me and BJ to the right! Also confirmed in the picture but not in order are 'Screwy' Driver, Steve Williams, Dave Armitage, Gerald (Taff) "When we captured Gerald he was of course wild..Wild?..I was absolutely livid" Anderson, Dennis Paynter, 'Wang' Kerr, Dave Waddington, Ginge Austin, Spotty Woodward, Doc Docherty, Phil Friend, Ron Selwood RIP, a Chieftain tank, Steve Hatcher, 'Shuggy' Jefferies, 'Bungalow' Ingram, a chap called Cole and Steve George...who is actually in an OP situated in the bush to the top left of 'Shuggy' Jefferies' head!
It even went to the point where he would teach the wives club how to do this nautical dance. They were of course in awe of him, his rugged handsome looks, his demeanour, the black nasty across his face were all things they seemed to love. Andy Fisher told me that after a dance session with Steve, Lyn would come home and.....(I will leave that to your imagination!). This very short You Tube video footage shot with a secret camera shows, Lyn Fisher (the one out of step!), Di Dunwell and Mandy Austin all enjoying their weekly dance session with Steve in the gym. Steve is actually camouflaged to look like a plastic chair!
Sadly the time for Steve to leave Paderborn arrived. There was a rumour that his 22 years service was up, but I am sure he was being recalled back to the Special Forces. His leaving do was a sombre affair, tempered by the fact that we drank ourselves silly. The Squadron Leader asked for silence and with tears streaming from the many wives present, with a new bit of black nasty across his eyes Steve walked up to the Squadron Leader to receive his leaving present. Sadly, unable to see he tripped over the carpet! Unperturbed, he leopard crawled to the Squadron Leader's feet, produced a grappling hook from his back pocket and threw it over the light fitting and climbed upright. The Squadron Leader, truly amazed announced shakily..."well Cpl George" (this caused absolute mayhem as the bar was rocked with an impromptu rendition of the Hornpipe!) "on behalf of all the A Squadron Officers, SNCOs and All Ranks I would like to present this small token of appreciation, that sums up your military career"......Rod Brummitt gave him the NOS book 9who said he never had a sense of humour)!!!!!